By: Gerri L. Elder

Guy Ritchie has officially joined the ranks of many: He and Madonna are now history, and reportedly, he is ready to party.

According to The Evening Standard, Ritchie took his divorce lawyer, Helen Ward, out to dinner to celebrate the end of his marriage to the pop star. The divorce was finalized in London on March 27 and approved by a divorce court in the U.S. as well.

Madonna has moved to New York, where the couple’s two children will live with her. Ritchie will have a regular child visitation schedule.

Ritchie snagged the former couple’s country estate in Wiltshire and a reported $24 to $31 million fortune in the divorce settlement. There was little drama in the negotiations while the couple settled up privately.

As Ritchie celebrated, Madonna reportedly returned to Malawi to adopt another child. She has applied to adopt 4-year old Mercy James, who she hopes to bring back to the U.S. shortly.

Copyright © 2010 TotalDivorce, LLC. (as licensee). All rights reserved.

By: Gerri L. Elder

Sometimes when filing for divorce, you may feel like you are divorcing your spouse’s family as well. This can be a difficult situation in close families, especially if your ex-spouse’s family has accepted you as a son or daughter.

If you are a parent, your child’s grandparents will still likely play an important role in their lives. Child custody and visitation agreements rarely address the child’s time with grandparents. In many states, grandparents may petition the court, if necessary, to establish visitation rights for grandparents.

Parents who share custody may work together to create a parenting plan that includes the child’s time with grandparents in the schedule. Even if you did not have a wonderful relationship with your in-laws, they will always be your child’s grandparents. In keeping the focus on the best interest of the child, parents should consider the continuing role of grandparents in the child’s life.

If your divorce was particularly bitter or if you never liked your in-laws in the first place, it can be a challenge to remain cordial and calm when it’s time for your child’s visits with them.

However, parents should show the same respect that they expect to receive and act in a courteous and polite manner when it is necessary to communicate with an ex-spouse or former in-laws. This “grin and bear it” approach will allow your child to be loved by their entire family – even the part that is no longer your family.

Copyright © 2010 TotalDivorce, LLC. (as licensee). All rights reserved.

When filing divorce, couples with children will either come to a child custody agreement or have custody decided by the court. After custody is decided, one parent will generally be ordered to pay child support.

State divorce laws vary, but some ex-spouses may also be entitled to receive alimony if the marriage lasted a number of years and there is a disparity of income or earning capacity.

Child Support

Each state has its own formula to determine the amount of child support payments. This formula is usually based largely on income and the amount of time each parent spends with the child; however, other factors may also come into play.

In some states, if a parent pays child support for a child from a previous relationship the amount of child support paid for other children may be reduced. Also, if there is significant travel cost involved with visitation, the amount of child support may be offset to compensate the parent who incurs the expense.

Alimony or Spousal Maintenance

Alimony, also sometimes called spousal maintenance or spousal support, is generally paid by an ex-spouse who has a higher income and earning capacity. To be eligible for alimony, ex-spouses usually must have less earning capacity and the marriage must have lasted for the period of time specified by state law. If an ex-spouse who receives alimony remarries, in most cases, the alimony payments stop.

Reducing the Amount of Payments

If a material change of circumstances occurs for one of the ex-spouses, such as a loss of income or financial windfall, either party may petition the court for a modification of the court order. Generally, the change of circumstances must influence the amount of the payments by at least 10% for the court to consider a modification.

Copyright © 2010 TotalDivorce, LLC. (as licensee). All rights reserved.

In 2004 Bruna Goldman and her son, Sean Goldman, said goodbye to husband and dad, David Goldman. David dropped them off at the airport for what he thought would be a two-week vacation in Brazil; however, Bruna had other plans.

After arriving in Brazil, Bruna contacted David and informed him that she planned to stay in her native Brazil with their four-year-old son – she wanted a divorce.

The Goldman’s divorced and Bruna remarried. She became pregnant and died last summer while giving birth. David was shocked when he found out a Brazilian judge awarded custody of his son to his late ex-wife’s husband.

David wants his son back and an international child custody battle is underway. So far, he has only been awarded visitation rights to his son by the Brazilian courts.

David says that Bruna and her husband had a Brazilian birth certificate issued for Sean, who was born in New Jersey. After Bruna’s death, her husband filed a petition to have David’s name removed from the child’s birth certificate.

Citing The Hague Convention of 1980, U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton has intervened in the case and asked the Brazilian government to return the child to his biological father. Clinton has said that she hopes the child will be returned to David very soon and will continue to press the Brazilian government until the matter is resolved.

Copyright © 2010 TotalDivorce, LLC. (as licensee). All rights reserved.

John Cleese Has Spousal Support Payments Halved

Monty Python star John Cleese has reportedly been affected by the poor economy that his alimony payments to his ex-wife have been reduced by half. The Sunday Mirror reported Cleese will now pay just £57,000 a month to Alyce Faye Eichelberger, his former wife of 15 years.

Kerr Smith Files for Divorce

Actor Kerr Smith is filing for divorce from his wife of five years, Harmoni Everett, citing irreconcilable differences. Smith became famous for his work on the TV series “Dawson Creek” as Jack McPhee. The couple does not have children.

Ted Haggard and Wife Appear on Divorce Court

Former evangelical pastor Ted Haggard and his wife will make an appearance on the April 1, 2009 national broadcast of Divorce Court. Viewers may feel they are being pranked for April Fools’ Day because the couple is not getting a divorce.

Instead, Lynn Toler, the judge of Divorce Court, reportedly interviews the couple about how their marriage survived despite Ted Haggard’s sex scandal involving a male prostitute.

Copyright © 2010 TotalDivorce, LLC. (as licensee). All rights reserved.

By: Gerri L Elder

Lies are a common but unfortunate issue in marriage. You may not realize it at first, but if you’re married to a liar, you will most likely discover it at some point during the marriage.

If you find out your spouse is a chronic liar, it may be difficult to remain calm. If you decide to confront your spouse about the lying, you should when you feel you’ll be able to keep a cool and level head. If there is any indication that your spouse may be abusive or violent when you talk, have the conversation in a public place.

During the discussion, you should let your spouse know that you know about the lies. If you have decided divorce is best to protect yourself from a lying spouse, take this opportunity to let them know that you will be filing for divorce. You can then discuss separation and a divorce settlement agreement.

Your spouse may beg for forgiveness and promise to stop the lying, but before you agree to a second chance, you should realize that some people are compulsive liars and the promises may also be lies. Be aware – lies are often used to manipulate. You might agree to a second chance, contingent on your spouse seeking counseling.

In the event that you choose not to divorce a lying spouse, you should realize there is real potential that you will be deceived again.

Copyright © 2010 TotalDivorce, LLC. (as licensee). All rights reserved.

Experts say that one of a child’s biggest fears is the fear of change, and with divorce there are plenty of disruptions. Parents must take extra steps to reassure children and make them feel secure while their world suddenly changes.

Everyone can remember the excitement they felt as their birthday came near. As children, there wasn’t a better day of the year, which is why parents should discuss how the child’s birthday will be celebrated each year and attempt to decide on a plan that is most comfortable and normal for the child. Conflict and competition between parents is not uncommon in child custody situations, but it should be avoided when planning and celebrating the child’s birthday

A Joint Celebration

If the parents are still friends after divorce, it may be beneficial to the child for both parents to take part in the celebration. However, parents should be careful not to give the child false hope of a reconciliation.

Holding the birthday party at a restaurant or other neutral place is a good idea if both parents plan to attend. Parents should be polite and respectful of each other at the party and work together to make the day special.

Splitting Time on the Child’s Birthday

In situations where it’s not possible for both parents to attend one birthday party, they may decide to split the day so that they each spend time with the child on their birthday. The non-custodial parent may take the child on a day trip, while the custodial parent prepares for a party in the evening. This way the child has a fun day and gets quality time with each parent and without fighting.

Celebrating During Regular Visitation

When parents don’t live in close proximity to one another, it may not be possible to share the child’s actual birthday. In these situations, the noncustodial parent should be sure to send a gift that arrives in time for the child’s birthday and call the child to let them know their day is remembered. The noncustodial parent can also plan to have a birthday celebration for the child during a regular visit close to the time of the child’s birthday.

Alternating Years

Some parents may incorporate an arrangement into their parenting plan to have the child on their birthday on alternate years. A year is a long time in a child’s life and this type of birthday time-sharing may be a disappointment for the child. If you choose to make arrangements like this, make sure to celebrate the birthday in a special way when it’s not your year.

Copyright © 2010 TotalDivorce, LLC. (as licensee). All rights reserved.

England has joined a trend that is spreading across Europe: The first British divorce fair was recently held in East Sussex.

At the divorce fairs, which are also called the “Starting Over Show,” divorce lawyers, money and life coaches, psychics, feng shui experts and sometimes even DNA testing labs and private detectives set up booths for the events. The divorce fair organizers regularly hold the events in different locations in Europe, where they draw both people filing divorce and those who are coping with the aftermath of divorce.

There were divorce lawyers at Britain’s first divorce fair, but the DNA paternity booth was not set up for this particular event. Free financial surgery was offered and pastors led letting go ceremonies to help bring closure to the newly single attendees.

Suzy Miller, a divorced mother of three, started the divorce fairs. After the first divorce fair in Vienna, Austria in October 2007 drew about 500 people, Miller realized she was on to something and has since held the events across Europe. She says that after her divorce filing, she wished there had been more support available and her own pain sparked the idea of the divorce fairs.

With more than 140,000 couples divorcing in the UK each year, the divorce fairs fill a need for many and now draw larger crowds. Of the divorce fairs, Miller tells The Telegraph, “It is about bringing together experts who will help people get through a breakup in the best way possible. In some cases a breakup can be the catalyst for good.”

Copyright © 2010 TotalDivorce, LLC. (as licensee). All rights reserved.

More Hogan Divorce Drama

The never-ending Hulk and Linda Hogan divorce made headlines again this week when Mrs. Hogan’s divorce lawyer got into a verbal sparring match with the wrestler. The altercation between divorce lawyer Ray Rafool and Hulk Hogan happened outside a courtroom after a hearing in the divorce case. Rafool was reportedly speaking with reporters about the hearing when Hogan spoke up from behind the pack of reporters. After Hogan’s outburst, Rafool asked Hogan if he was going to wrestle him.

During the hearing, the judge granted the release of $225,000 in frozen assets for Hulk Hogan, whose real name is Terry Bollea.

Anne Heche and Coley Laffoon Finalize Divorce

Thirteen months after Coley Laffoon filed for divorce from Anne Heche, the couple’s divorce was finalized. Heche and Laffoon were married for six years and have one son together. Laffoon cited irreconcilable differences on his divorce petition.

Heche is now expecting a child with James Tupper.

Steve Wynn’s Wife Files for Divorce

Wynn Resorts Ltd. CEO Steve Wynn has been served with divorce papers by his wife Elayne. Mrs. Wynn also sits on the board of the company. The Wynns have been married 18 years during the most recent marriage. They were married and divorced once before and have spent more than 40 years together.

Legal experts predict that the divorce settlement in this case could be the largest ever in the entertainment industry, as Steve Wynn is estimated to be worth more than $5 billion. It also has the potential to split the company. Mrs. Wynn owns 24 million shares of Wynn Resorts, making her part of the company worth about $464 million.

Copyright © 2010 TotalDivorce, LLC. (as licensee). All rights reserved.

After divorce, one of the many things you’ll do differently is filing taxes.

Taxpayer Status

You may have filed your income taxes as “married, filing separately” or jointly during the marriage, but when the divorce is final you will file as an individual or head of household taxpayer status. However, if you were still married as of New Year’s Eve, you and your ex-spouse may elect to file a final joint tax return. In some cases, filing jointly for the final year of marriage may have tax advantages.

Alimony Payments

If you receive alimony or spousal support after divorce, this money is taxable as income. If you pay alimony or spousal support, you are entitled to a tax deduction for the money paid to your ex-spouse.

Capital Gains Taxes

Capital gains taxes may apply to assets you receive in your divorce settlement. This should be kept in mind when negotiating a divorce settlement agreement to avoid tax liabilities. Capital gains taxes are based on the fair market value of an asset after subtracting the cost. Mutual funds, investment funds and other assets may be subject to capital gains taxes at a rate of up to 35 percent. There is a $250,000 capital gain exclusion per spouse for homes, if they are used as a primary residence for at least two of the previous five years.

Claiming Children as Dependents

If children are involved in the divorce process, the divorce settlement agreement should specify which parent will claim the child as a dependent on tax returns. In some cases parents will alternate years, or if there is more than one child, parents may agree to each claim specific children as dependents. Both parents may not claim the same child as a dependent for the same year.

Copyright © 2010 TotalDivorce, LLC. (as licensee). All rights reserved.