How Divorce May Benefit Children
Many parents who decide to contact a divorce lawyer take care to act in the best interests of their children whenever possible. Issues of child custody and child support often play a prominent role in divorce cases, and understandably so - the court's decisions on matters like these can determine how and when parents get to see children they used to live with full-time.
But even the most conscientious divorcing parents may be disheartened by media outlets that insist divorce is unhealthy for children and will cause them to be "maladjusted" or just plain sad. Luckily, a recent study found that divorce may not affect children as negatively as was once believed.
In fact, children whose parents divorce may actually have opportunities that kids with still-married folks miss out on. Don't believe it? Read on.
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The Benefits of Divorce for Children
A recent article in East Valley Living described how one divorced mom created a schedule book for her daughter that allowed the girl and both her parents to keep track of her many activities. Especially with the number of extracurricular activities that many kids are involved in these days, school-aged children have plenty of opportunities to benefit from a divorce.
- Communication skills: Kids whose parents live in two homes have to keep two families up to date about their deadlines and schedules. This means that those whose parents are divorced must learn to effectively communicate when projects are due, when practice starts, who's responsible for cooking for the bake sale and more. Plus, kids of divorce often have to communicate with teachers (let them know to allow for extra seating at parent-teacher events, or to address a note home to a step parent, etc.).
Divorce forces kids to keep many groups of people updated about their lives and needs.
- Organization skills: Knowing which books and supplies need to be at which house requires a child to be on top of homework assignments. Even knowing which bus to take home any given day means that a child with divorced parents must be on top of the family schedule.
Divorce pushes kids to keep track of where they're going and what they need to complete their assignments.
- Time management/Planning skills: Kids with only one household don't have to plan ahead when a science fair project is due next Monday - they know that all their supplies and important papers are at home. But kids with divorced parents must plan ahead to make sure they have the necessary research notes, construction materials and resources to complete a big assignment.
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Divorce gives kids an opportunity to think ahead, plan and act accordingly.
- Relationship-building skills: Ever moved to a new neighborhood? Ever had new people move in with you and be incorporated into your family? Many kids with divorced parents have. Meeting and learning to live with new people is an important skill most people don't have to learn until college or their first job.
Divorce teaches kids to adapt to challenging living situations.
An estimated 40 million American families are living apart these days, which means you are in no way alone if you're going through a divorce. Knowing that you and your children can actually benefit from what can be a difficult transition can help you make the most of your new life.