Divorce & the Kids: What About Grandma?
A divorce
can have a tough emotional toll on all parties involved. When children are
involved, divorce proceedings can become even more complicated. In addition to
dealing with the idea that the marriage is over, parents must also
consider child
support, child
custody and child
visitation matters.
But Where do Grandparents Fit in the Child’s Life After Divorce?
In this new divorce generation, grandparent rights have
become a controversial issue. Grandparent-right supporters are pushing for
court intervention, arguing that grandparents are an integral aspect to their
grandchildren’s lives and they shouldn’t be denied visitation because the
parents divorced.
On the other hand, there are people who oppose the court infringing
too greatly on a person’s civil liberties, arguing that a child’s parent should
determine who may or may not visit with their child.
Elisabeth Kirkman knows this fight all too well. She’s the
state coordinator for a chapter of the Grandchildren/Grandparents Rights of
North Carolina. She’s also a grandmother who’s been denied seeing her four grandchildren
ages 5, 8, 9 and 13, according to an article
in The Dispatch. It’s been three years since she’s seen her youngest
daughter’s kids—and she’s been fighting for her rights ever since.
Kirkman’s grandparents' rights group serves as a support
group for other grandparents who have been separated from their grandchildren and works hard to change the law. The group has been lobbying
state legislators to sponsor a bill that would allow people to
petition the court for visitation rights for grandparents.
Kirkman is just one of thousands of grandparents in the
county who have been kept from visiting their grandkids for a variety of
reasons, including the child’s parents filing divorce. She said that she wants
to create the law to help other grandparents in similar situations.
"It’s one of the cruelest things a child can do to a
parent—to take away their grandchildren," she told the newspaper.
"Grandchildren are your children. You love them just as much."
The Court’s Position
Grandparents visitation and custody guidelines aren't necessarily guaranteed rights by law. Many state courts are starting to recognize grandparents'
rights and create legislation to enforce those rights; however, it
is important to note that some of the revised visitation laws may be
constitutionality questioned.
For example, in 2000, the U.S. Supreme Court determined in Troxel
v. Granville that a Washington
visitation law violated the due process rights of parents to raise the
children. This case caused several states - Florida, Illinois, Iowa,
Michigan and Washington - to modify
visitation statutes; however, many other states stood firm in visitation laws.
Visitation
rights for grandparents is a relatively new subject for courts to take on and
the law varies by state. If you have questions about whether you might have legal
visitation rights, a divorce
lawyer could help you decide whether you should proceed through the courts
to see you grandchildren again.
What Can You Do?
Grandparents who have been denied visitation rights should
check the provisions in the states’ statutes to determine the conditions for
visitation, factors the court must consider in ordering visitation rights and identify how to file a request for child visitation. If you do decide to proceed legally, you should be properly
prepared because the burden of proof is generally upon the grandparent.
Although states may have similar statutes, state courts may
apply statutory provisions differently. Every state requires family courts to
consider the child's best interest before awarding custody or visitation
to grandparents.
The legal visitation rights of grandparents can be a
complicated issue. A divorce lawyer may be a good resource to help you determine how to proceed in
gaining rights to see your grandchildren.
