Recognition of Same-Sex Divorce a Growing Issue in Many
States
In an article in the New York Times, Marcelle S. Fischler
examines a growing problem in the field of divorce. We're introduced to C.C. and C.M., two women
who married in Massachusetts in 2005. The couple lives in New York. A year following their marriage, C.M.
gave birth to a daughter, and C.C. adopted the child.
As in many marriages, tensions soon followed, some
health-related, some financial in nature and others, more unique to the
situation: the "stress of a same sex marriage." By 2005, C.C. had moved out.
The couple sought legal advice as they worked to determine
child custody of their daughter, child support and alimony. The state of New York does not allow
same-sex marriages, but the governor has issued an order requiring state agencies
to recognize marriages performed in other states.
In October of 2008, a New York State Supreme Court Justice,
Rosalyn H. Richter, granted the couple a divorce. Their case was the first such dissolution of
a same-sex marriage in New York. Another
case is currently moving forward, this one involving the recognition of a
marriage that occurred in Canada. More
are on the way.
Current New York state residency requirements for divorce require
a couple to live in the state for six months if the marriage was performed out
of state.
C.M. points out the couples' very mixed feelings about not
being able to marry in their home state, but being able to divorce there. Nancy Chemtob, the attorney who represented C.M., says the
divorce was similar to the heterosexual version, with the usual disputes over
school choice and child visitation.
States are struggling over this issue: How to treat divorcing
couples whose marriages they may not recognize.
A judge in New Jersey recently ruled that same-sex marriages performed
outside the state are recognized only in the case of divorce. In other states, including Rhode Island,
Oklahoma, and Texas, have refused to grant divorce. The situation is likely to only grow more
complex.
The California Supreme Court
recently upheld the state’s ban on gay marriage, while ruling the 18,000
marriages in existence still stand. More
states are also legalizing gay marriage, which will inevitably lead to more
cases of same-sex divorce for courts across the country to manage. Vermont is scheduled to begin allowing same-sex
marriages when a new law goes into effect on Sept. 1.
David Greenan, a psychologist and family therapist who also
teaches at the Teachers College at Columbia, says that the formalized divorce process can benefit a couple psychologically, as it's a ritual that helps the
parties to separate and disengage. Greenan also feels that states that allow the divorce of same-sex
marriages but not the unions themselves send a "negative, destabilizing
message" to same-sex couples.
C.C., who has joint child custody of her daughter, says
considering the possibility of divorce is as important to couples as it is to
states.
"It’s just like every other relationship," she says. "We are not in fairytale land. It’s real. Sometimes it doesn’t work out."
Source: The New
York Times
